


my love (could we come close to havin' it all?)

by maxverstappens



Category: Formula 1 RPF
Genre: M/M, boyfriends doing boyfriend stuff, but dan n max..... i miss them, i love them, no shade to pierre or alex, this is so self indulgent idc
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-27
Updated: 2020-01-27
Packaged: 2021-02-26 09:35:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22440925
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/maxverstappens/pseuds/maxverstappens
Summary: Daniel has always been Max's favourite teammate.
Relationships: Daniel Ricciardo/Max Verstappen
Comments: 7
Kudos: 110





	my love (could we come close to havin' it all?)

**Author's Note:**

> okay so hey. hi. it's been a while. literally. tomorrow it would've been three months since i posted an f1 fic i'm jfjrkslsjdsl so awkward but i came out from under my rock to post this! s/o to the loml for inspiring me with this idea because they love alex.... so babe love u <3 (also i swear there's probably 29392002 mistakes but idk i'll fix them later)
> 
> also the title is from hold me while you wait - lewis capaldi ok bye 
> 
> okay a few things,
> 
> 1) idk what this is but it's not angsty so i'm--  
2) dan and max are apparently gonna have 3 kids in the series i haven't written yet  
3) the mood of this fic is kinda retrospective for a lot of it which is weird for me but it works ok  
4) yo i miss f1  
5) i love alex and pierre so when i say no shade i love them but maxiel will remain superior  
6) anyway enjoy! i'm gonna hide under my rock again

Daniel has always been Max's favourite teammate and whilst that doesn't seem like much of a surprise now, it hasn't always been this easy to think about, to know, to accept. Max came into the team mid-season but was drawn to Daniel anyway, drawn to him in a way that at eighteen years old he couldn’t put a name to. It was as simple as Daniel was Daniel and Max liked him, Max liked being his teammate, Max liked Daniel in a way he’d never liked anybody before. 

Daniel took to having a teammate much younger than him in his stride and Max fit in almost immediately despite all the immaturity and the fiery erraticness that seemed to follow Max around, all the comments, the mistakes, the one constant - despite the odd hiccups, arguments, Daniel was the one person who retained the most faith in him. The one who didn’t give up or push him down towards the pits of hell every time he made a mistake. 

It felt so naturally unnatural when Max started his first full season, how close Dan and Max became, how they practically became one person, how most people couldn’t mention one without mentioning the other. Somewhere along the line they became DanandMax and Max didn’t realise the connotations until he was practically smacked in the face with them. His win in Malaysia that year started a domino effect of events that started with the minute that he’d stepped away from the podium. Max can’t pinpoint the exact moment that their relationship went from being friends and teammates to teetering on the edge of something more, 

The most confusing part for Max was how he _ wasn’t _put off by it, how years of growing up with his father being so painfully homophobic to the point where Max needed a stronger word to describe how ashamed he felt. Max should have ran a mile but he stayed and he for a lack of a better word, indulged himself in the attention and he got lost in races and nights before. He got lost in the subtle touches, the longing glances, how Daniel always smiled at Max differently to everybody else, the opportunities he took to make stupid jokes because Daniel always knew they would make him laugh. 

Max still remembers how sticky Daniel’s champagne covered hand felt against the back of his neck as soon as they had ducked away from the cameras, how the _ great race _had felt more meaningful than all of the others ones that Daniel had said to him. Still, he couldn’t place the exact moment because everything after that blended into one blur that was only worsened by the addition of alcohol and perhaps, alcohol, like most things, was the final thing needed to break through the wall between them. 

_ Max doesn’t get drunk often and perhaps that’s why he’s so much of a lightweight that the team start to take the piss out of him less than an hour into their celebrations of Max’s win and that includes Daniel who records some of Max’s more ridiculous moments. _

_ “Not fair. Stop. Daniel. Stop.” Max isn’t above whining as he’s found out as he tries to wrestle Daniel’s phone out of his hand but Max’s reflexes are terrible compared to a much more sober Dan who uses this latest venture as an excuse to tease him even more. _

_ “And here… Max down… we have the rarest creature, this is the Max Verstappen who…. oh my god are you okay?!” _

_ Max gives a wobbly thumbs up from where he’s just slipped and fell onto the floor - narrowly missing banging his head. Daniel chuckles at his expense as he slips his phone into his pocket and leans down to help Max back to his feet. _

_ “Listen, mate… okay.” Daniel doesn’t get to finish before Max is stumbling and falling against Daniel’s chest. “Come on, let’s get some air.” _

_ Their arms are tangled together as Daniel leads Max outside. _

_ “I think it’s safe to say you’re a lightweight, mate.” _

_ “M’not light. Weight.” Max tries to argue but the glassiness in his eyes and how he keeps jerking to stop himself throwing up says otherwise. “Promise.” _

_ Daniel leans down so that his forehead is pressed against Max’s. “Course not, Max.” _

_ Neither of them are sure who makes the first move but Max’s fingers are working their way through Daniel’s curls as Daniel curls his fingers around the back of Max’s neck, their lips moulding together as one. _

It’s still contested between them now, usually at the most inconvenient times or just the weirdest who officially made the first move out of them. Max remembers Daniel walking into the garage on the morning of the first practice session in Australia and asked him at too loud of a volume if he had managed to remember whether it was him or Dan that kissed him first. Max wanted to slap him until he looked around and realised that absolutely nobody was in the garage yet. Max still doubts it was him and the doubt only lies there because he genuinely cannot remember a thing about the night after that race and the fact that Daniel has _ never _let him live it down makes for constant teasing. 

Dating was one thing and they were fine with that, making the jokes real, hiding it from some people, telling others, they acted nonchalant about it - it was new, exciting and Max was falling hard. Translating that relationship into what started as a good season but ended so badly, to say they almost fell apart as quickly as they fell together would be the biggest understatement of the year and that beat Daniel’s mantra of _ my car is fucking shit. _Bahrain was a race to forget for both of them and they sulked together, they crashed into each other in Baku and argued until their throats ached and they were too tired to yell anymore. They celebrated Dan’s win in China with champagne sticky kisses when nobody was looking. They celebrated Dan’s Monaco win with the team before a quiet celebration at home, in sweats with pizza and Netflix, something low-key and disgustingly domestic that Max wondered if he’d suddenly aged ten years. 

_ “I feel like I just turned thirty and this is date night and I’m the dad of three.” Max grumbles tossing the crust of the pizza towards the box but missing and it lands on the table smearing some sauce across it. _

_ “Three kids, huh.” Dan smiles, eyebrows raised as he turns his gaze away from the TV. “Kids these days… thirty isn’t old either.” _

_ “You’re only saying that because you’re thirty next year and you’re in denial.” Max points out and maybe he’s not too far off. “And. Yeah. Maybe I will have three kids.” Max shrugs, voice lowering with every word as he turns his attention back to the TV, his hands hiding under the sleeves of Dan’s hoodie, it’s bigger on him - barely but it’s enough to cover his hands without rolling the sleeves. _

_ “Do you want three kids?” _

_ The question was coming, hell, how Max didn’t see the question coming takes him so far by surprise that he almost topples over the side of the couch. Max purses his lips but doesn’t answer, he pretends he’s so deeply interested in the TV show that they’re watching that he doesn’t even register they’re showing a bunch of adverts instead of the actual show. _

_ “Baby…” Daniel moves his arm from around the back of the couch and lets it rest carefully against Max’s knee, “do you?” _

_ Max shrugs, “maybe.” _

_ “It’s a lot of work.” Daniel points out, “Michelle and I ran our parents off their feet and we were only two.” _

_ “It would be nice, to have a big family, I mean… it’s not that big of a deal. I’m still a kid.” _

_ “We’d never be bored…” Daniel continues thoughtfully, reluctant to let the subject drop completely. “We’d never get any time to ourselves but imagine having three little versions of you be happy to see me… it would be the welcome home I never get because you’re either fucking asleep or playing FIFA.” Daniel chuckles, squeezing Max’s knee tighter. “We would have enough for a podium - I know our kids’ Halloween costumes…. They’re going as a podium.” _

_ That single idea breaks Max completely and he bursts out laughing so abruptly that he almost chokes on his own laughter. Daniel falls against Max’s shoulder stifling his own laughter at how that was the thing that broke through. _

_ “I’ll let you hit puberty before we have kids though.” Daniel mumbles, kissing Max’s jaw before leaning back and settling down onto the couch but not managing to escape the retaliating slap from Max. _

Everything began falling apart after that but even Max didn’t _ exactly _see Dan switching teams coming until nine minutes before it was announced. They weren’t together, it was strange in itself for them not to be together during the summer break but when Daniel called him up just after eight in the morning and told him - Max was fucking glad that Daniel wasn’t in throwing distance of him because he was destroyed. The silent treatment killed him and coming back was harder, neither of them knew what to say, their interactions were forced and Max was convinced they’d broken up without saying it. Austin destroyed Dan and Max lived off the highs of a win in Mexico a week later. 

They’d made it. At the end of the season, going home to Monaco and just falling into Max’s apartment had been more relief than anything. They didn’t need to talk, they definitely needed to sleep but resisted the temptation. They’d left their suitcases in the hallway and made it to the couch, exhausted, emotional, questions still between them but Daniel surged forward and kissed him and nothing else mattered. 

The following season felt strange, having Pierre as a teammate wasn’t awful but the constant reminder at the back of his mind that across the way he didn’t have Daniel anymore, it caused an emptiness to thump against his chest. It felt like Max was lost for the first few weeks, confused, adjusting, it wasn’t as easy to adjust this time around. Still, coming home to Daniel after every race was worth it. 

Nothing changed with them, being on different teams only brought them closer, in a sense it made them appreciate each other more. Pierre was a good teammate, he wasn’t as challenging to race against as Daniel had been but he could’ve asked for a worse teammate. 

Max got his first pole position in Hungary and after celebrating with his team, Max went looking for the only person he truly wanted to celebrate this with and Daniel had been _ honestly _just as excited as Max had been. 

The _ I’m so proud of you, I love you _that is whispered against Max’s hair when he hugs him tightly the second that they find each other in the slowly dispersing crowd means more to Max than he ever thought words could.

It was the worst kept secret that came in the summer - Pierre was going be swapped with Alex - Max thinks anybody with eyes and who had watched one race that season knew _ that _was going to happen. The air of consistency had vanished completely and Max was racing with his third teammate but missing Daniel even more. Alex proved more of a challenge and it ignited the same type of competitiveness in his veins that racing with Daniel did at first, he liked his two teammates this season but he loved Daniel. 

Spa was a dark race, it reminded everybody that life is precious and can be snatched away from you in the cruellest instances in less than a second and knowing that they still had a race that weekend, Max had never felt further away from Daniel. The distractedness that came with heavy hearts, the fear that you push to the back of your mind made its presence known with a vengeance and Max had never felt so emotionally exhausted returning home. Daniel wasn’t there when he got home and Max panicked until he finally turned his phone back on and three messages came through with Dan explaining that he was gonna get back a little later, and fucking hell, those couple hours until Daniel got home were the closest to torture that Max has ever felt. 

No words had been needed to be exchanged from the minute that Daniel had returned and Max nearly tripped over himself trying to get to him, wrapping his arms around him and just revelling in the fact that Daniel is here, that he has him in his arms. He knows that it’s almost impossible to comfort the other, they can’t, both of them know the danger and the unpromise that this career brings to the both of them but for those first few seconds, those reminders that despite how everything got taken away, they still have each other.

That night Daniel held Max a little tighter and they both felt sick to their stomachs as they grieved the loss of another talented driver. 

The season goes by in the blink of an eye every year, it feels as though it gets shorter with every year that the both of them are racing and Max doubles his pole position tally in Brazil. He wins the race at Interlagos and deals with one of the craziest ends to a race, and Max had won in Germany earlier in the year. 

_ The end to the race is madness but Max is sure of one thing, he’s the winner, his third win of the season and he’s fucking hyped. He celebrates with his team before doing interviews after interviews and celebrating on the podium but all the while, he’s thinking about Daniel - he misses their podiums together and he tries to keep himself together long enough until he’s able to go and be with him. _

_ He finds a spare moment to sneak away and finds Daniel ambling around looking for him to, _

_ “Champ.” _

_ Max rolls his eyes but walks up to him anyway, their fingers tangling together and smiling at each other until their cheeks hurt, they talk about the race until they’re able to disappear somewhere away from the cameras, just to take a minute with themselves. _

_ Daniel pulls Max to him the second that they get that and kisses him as though he hasn’t seen him in six months, palms pressed against his cheeks and smiling against his boyfriend’s lips. Max’s fingers twist in Daniel’s shirt and he pulls him closer, _

_ “You taste like champagne.” _

_ “No shit, babe.” Max mumbles, leaning in to kiss him once more. “Can’t wait to go home.” _

_ Daniel kisses him once more, kisses his forehead, kisses the side of his head and wraps Max in a hug. “Yeah, me too.” _

The season was completed with another podium in Abu Dhabi before the season came to an end and Max and Dan were able to disappear and take some time for themselves, to get ready for the holidays and finally do something other than lie around in their apartment watching terrible TV shows and napping twice a day. They had made it an entire season, they made it through their first season of not being teammates and it hadn’t been as hard as the two of them were worried it would be back in February.

Coming back after Abu Dhabi, Max came home later this time - three and a half hours after Daniel had text him to say he’s just got back and he opens the door, pushing his suitcase into the hallway and ditching it there. The TV isn’t on and the apartment feels eerily quiet as Max shuts the door behind him, kicking off his shoes and walking through, he drops his keys on the table but the kitchen and living room are empty. 

“Babe?” Max calls out, 

When he doesn’t get an answer - he walks around more until reaching the bedroom and pushing the door open slightly, smiling at the sight of Daniel sleeping soundly under the blankets with only his curls visible - in the exact place that Max wants to be - the exhaustion of twenty one races finally catching up with him. 

Max ignores the dishes on the counter and ignores the fact that he should probably unpack sooner rather than later and shuffles across the room until he reaches the bed, pulling back the covers and sliding in. 

Still asleep, Daniel reaches out and grabs Max by the waist pulling him closer and pushing his face against his boyfriend’s neck.

“What took you s’long?” Daniel mumbles out, the words vibrating against Max’s neck, words laced thickly with sleep. 

“Doesn’t matter, I’m home now.” 

Daniel nods, “yeah, you are.” 

Max turns and starts brushing his fingers through Daniel’s dishevelled curls as Daniel falls back asleep immediately. It’s been a strange season to say the least but glancing down and seeing Daniel, Max realises that not a lot has changed. 

And if there’s one thing that he knows for sure it’s that Daniel is _ still _his favourite teammate and the only constant that keeps him grounded when things get rough and he doesn’t doubt for a second that he’s going to feel the same in ten years time too. 

“I love you, yeah?” Daniel mumbles out sleepily, clutching tighter, his accent coming out in a stronger drawl as Max kisses his forehead, 

Max loves him too, sometimes so much that it hurts but there’s nobody he’d rather do all of this with. Neither of them are certain what’s going to happen during the next season or the season after that but Max is sure that if he still has Daniel by his side throughout it all - it can’t be that bad. 

And Max doesn’t think he wants to have it any other way.

**Author's Note:**

> [tumblr!](https://pierlex.tumblr.com)   



End file.
